Middle School Children - Developmental Milestones

Physical

  • Puberty - children go through big physical changes and experience periods of rapid physical growth. Girls tend to develop earlier than boys.

  • Clumsy - middle schoolers tend to be a bit clumsy as height and weight change quickly. They can often appear awkward and not quite in control of their bodies.

  • Uneven Development - often middle schoolers begin to show uneven development in motor skills like agility, balance, strength, and flexibility.
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  • Sleep - adolescents need lots of sleep as their bodies change and grow.

Cognitive

  • Problem Solving - adolescents begin to develop critical thinking skills and become more adept at decision making and organizing ideas.

  • Abstract Concepts - middle schoolers are developing the ability to understand large, abstract concepts like power and influence.

  • Questioning - adolescents start to question the world around them, develop a worldview and values, and think about how the present affects the future.
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  • Flexibility - middle schoolers become more capable of adapting to classroom changes and utilizing different approaches to solving problems.

Language

  • Slang - students at this age are more capable of understanding metaphors, slang, and different ways of speaking.

  • Code-Switching - this happens when a child adopts different ways of speaking and being in different situations, places, or groups. Students likely do this unconsciously and it allows them to fit in.

  • Debate - at this age, students are interested in having discussions and debates.

  • Tone - middle schoolers start to pay more attention to body language, tone of voice, and other nonverbal cues.

Social & Emotional

  • Individuality and Fitting In - middle schoolers are trying to find themselves as individuals but are also highly aware of where they fit into the social order.

  • People Pleasing - at this age, students are likely to be highly sensitive to other people's opinions and reactions. 

  • Awareness - this age group develops a sense of awareness of challenges and pride in accomplishments.
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  • Secrets - at this age, students understand the value of being able to keep a secret and have a better awareness of what is appropriate to say and do in different situations.
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What do Middle School Children Need From You?

  • Consistency
  • Empathy
  • Compassion
  • Forgiveness
  • Love and understanding
  • Structure and organization
  • Clear expectations
  • A fair and consistent discipline system
  • Consistent feedback
  • Praise for good decisions and well done work
  • A mentor and guide
  • Someone to listen
  • Someone to bounce ideas off of
  • To meet them where they are
  • Help with making positive choices
  • Help developing positive habits
  • A little silliness 
  • Acceptance of who they are in this moment
  • Attention to detail - they need someone to notice when things are not right
  • Someone to look out for them
  • Opportunities to be creative
  • Opportunities to take a risk
  • Help with recovering from failure and trying again
  • Opportunities to explore and express the self
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Notes & Advice

  • Sometimes an adolescent will throw something out there to test it out, to say it out loud, and to see your reaction. They are not necessarily trying to shock you, but rather, they are gauging your reaction to see if what they are experiencing is normal. 

  • Capitalize on teachable moments. If something comes up in class that needs immediate follow up, do it. Do not gloss over or ignore hateful language or actions. Do not be afraid to engage in a difficult discussion with the class.
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  • Meet students where they are - every child will be different and need something different from you. That might even change for each student from day to day. Just be you and show students that you care about them as human beings. The more you get to know them in down times during the day and in class, the more you will be able to help them. 

  • Middle school life is drama. At this age, things that seem small to an adult are really really big for an adolescent. Remember what it felt like to be that age. Remember what it feels like to be left out or ignored or made fun of. 
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Red Flags

  • Hoarding food - low income students may not have enough to eat at home. If you see a student hoarding food, it likely means they are in need of some assistance.

  • Inappropriate Clothing - If a child wears the same items of clothing every day, repeatedly has clothing that is ragged and soiled, or is repeatedly wearing clothing that is truly inappropriate for the weather, please make this known to your adcom and admin.

  • Primary Caretakers - some of our students act almost as primary caretakers for younger siblings. There isn't necessarily much we can do about this, but it is helpful to know this about a student so that we can assist them emotionally.

  • Inappropriate Knowledge - if a child has an inordinate amount of inappropriate knowledge about sex or other adult topics, it might be cause for further investigation. Many children see adult content online, but might also be exposed to something at home they should not be.
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